I know Nathaniel Greene usually does the dog stories on Def-Con News but I beat him to this one. A family in North Carolina ditched their dog because they saw him humping another male dog and were afraid he is gay. It has been my contention for a long time that most people who own dogs shouldn’t have them.
Here’s the dumbest non-Kamala Harris story of the week from The New York Post:
A North Carolina dog has been abandoned after his owners saw him humping another male pooch and feared he might be gay, animal rescuers said.
Fezco was dropped off at the Stanly County Animal Protective Services, a shelter in Albemarle, which is seeking a foster home and a new family for the 50-pound dog, WCCB reported.
The shelter claimed his owners were aghast when they saw Fezco mounting another male dog…
Here’s the thing about male dogs, especially ones that haven’t been fixed, they will f*ck anything and everything. All that means is he’s normal male dog. That’s it. When they aren’t humping things, they pass the time by licking their balls.
A dog humping another dog isn’t necessarily a sexual thing, it’s more about dominance. This is from PetGuide.com:
Male dogs may hump other male dogs as a display of social status or to establish control. In cases like this, the dog may or may not display an erection but he is unlikely to ejaculate.
Female dogs will do this to other females just as easily as they will to another male, though not quite as readily in that males tend to be alphas and packleaders anyway.
I have a female dog who has been spayed and she’s a humping machine. She’ll hump people’s legs and even other dogs. One time we were at the dog park and there’s this pit-mix that she kind of has a crush on. Usually she just follows him around imitating his behavior. If he lifts his leg on something, she’ll do the same even though that’s not how she goes to the bathroom.
This dog largely ignores my dog even though she tries hard to get his attention. Finally, she just jumped on his back and started humping him. He actually yelped like he was hurt, though it was just his ego. My dog doesn’t identify as male dog, she just wanted to make that dog her bitch.
Which brings us to another reason why dogs hump. Huskies, of which my dog is a mix, are a very playful breed and when they want to play, sometimes they hump. I assume other breeds are like this as well.
Before we get out of here, this is from K9 of Mine:
Dogs live unconstrained by internal (or external, for that matter) conflicts about their sexuality.
In short, dogs can’t really be gay, simply because dogs don’t have a sexual orientation or consistent sexual preference the way some humans do.
There you have it.
I would imagine anyone who thinks their dog is gay is probably struggling with their own sexuality. They definitely don’t know shit about dogs.
It’s probably a good thing that this family got rid of this dog. Now he can find a new family that knows a little something about dogs and maybe get a better name than “Fezco.”