This week’s biggest WTF? was a Chinese spy ballon floating over the United States. Here’s some possible non-Eric Swalwell-related WTF? the Chinese may have detected with their low-tech recon device:
Headline of the Week
Teen lands bizarre hole in one — in his butt: How docs got it out
Doctors in Australia recently struggled to remove a foreign object trapped in a 14-year-old boy’s intestine after he put it in his anus, according to a report published last month in a medical journal.
While X-rays seem to show the teen experimented with a round, white egg, it was actually a golf ball that was pictured making its way to his sigmoid colon, the last section of the large intestine that connects to the rectum.
The boy, whose name was not disclosed, reportedly panicked when he couldn’t dispose of the golf ball by defecating, so he told his mother, who rushed him to Royal Adelaide Hospital. He did not complain of any discomfort, according to Case Reports in Surgery.
Doctors tried to remove the golf ball with various devices — a suction cup, medical net, looped snare, quad-prong grasper, retrieval pouch and balloon catheter.
They reported stopping with the “aggressive” interventions after more than two hours, hoping the golf ball would “spontaneously enter the rectum.” However, an X-ray showed it was still there even 24 hours later.
The boy’s family was reportedly not keen on doctors performing more physical removal attempts, so the medical specialists administered one liter of laxatives. Three hours later, doctors noted a “successful evacuation” of the golf ball and observed “no evidence of bowel injury.”
They did, however, advise the boy “against inserting further objects into his rectum in the future.”
Impressive considering it was a par 4.
Find of the Week
Human penis found at Alabama gas station
A human penis was found in the parking lot of an Alabama gas station.
It was found shortly after 6 a.m. Monday at a gas station on Interstate 10 in Mobile, according to a local newspaper.
The Mobile Police Department thinks it might be from the victim of a deadly motorcyclist crash on a nearby highway.
Christopher Means, 29, died after losing control of his motorcycle and being hit by multiple vehicles.
The Mobile Police Department confirmed to FOX News Digital that, “The appendage located at the gas station is not related to a murder or an assault.”
A gas station worker reportedly discovered the penis.
While police did not explain how the appendage arrived at the gas station, local reports say that surveillance video appeared to show it fall from a truck that had stopped to get fuel.
Literally knocked his dick off.
Fine of the Week
A transgender woman who exposed her ‘penis and testicles’ when she opened her front door to two police officers has been fined £320, a court heard.
Jane Knightingale, 55, stood fully unclothed in the doorway of her house during a confrontation with the two constables who had been called to her house in Fountainbridge, Edinburgh, following reports of a violent disturbance.
Knightingale then refused to allow the police officers into her home, called one a ‘Nazi fascist’ and said her name was ‘James Savile OBE’ when asked to identify herself during the drunken exchange on January 17, 2020.
She stood trial at Edinburgh Sheriff Court this week accused of obstructing police, making homophobic and racially offensive comments, as well as intentionally exposing herself to officers.
The transgender musician, who court papers state is also known as Jason Pilley, was arrested and claimed she was bundled into a police van and taken to Livingston police station while still unclothed.
PC David Hughes said he and a colleague found a ‘bloody handprint’ on the front door of Knightingale’s home following a report of a disturbance around 10.30pm.
He said he was left ‘shocked’ when Knightingale answered the door to them while fully naked.
When procurator fiscal Duncan Mackenzie asked PC Hughes what he observed when the door opened, the officer said ‘her nakedness’ and ‘her penis’.
He also said the woman told him to ‘f*** off’ and called his colleague ‘a German Nazi fascist’.
This is a case where the carpet doesn’t match the pronouns.
Penal Code of the Week
Jealous wife ‘bit off husband’s penis and stabbed his genitals’ in cheating row
A woman has been arrested after allegedly stabbing her husband in the genitals and then attempting to bite off his penis.
The victim, Eliud Kepha Onuko, said his wife Grace Oyaro had become convinced that he had been cheating on her with another woman.
Prosecutors say she attacked her husband in their home in the Nyanchwa estate in Kisii, Kenya, on New Year’s Eve, stabbing Onuko and biting his penis “causing grievous harm contrary to the penal code”.
Oyaro appeared before senior principal magistrate Caroline Ocharo and has pleaded not guilty to all charges.
Frank Maswari, a lawyer representing her husband, said Oyaro should not be released on bail because she could potentially go on to attack him again.
Kaino ordered: “Let the police escort the accused to her house whenever she wants to visit until the case is over.”
Onuko, 38, was taken to Kisii Teaching and Referral Hospital for treatment where he underwent major surgery.
Oyaro was arrested by police officers from Nyanchwa police station after she was discharged from a private hospital in Kisii where she had also been undergoing treatment for an unknown ailment.
Cheater, cheater, peter eater.
Pop of the Week
Ten-kilo breast model Mary Magdalene has one of her implants burst: This is what she looks like
Canadian model Mary Magdalene, who revealed back in 2022 that she was kicked off a plane from Canada to Boston for wearing a top allegedly too small for her nearly 10-kg breasts, has revealed that one of her implants has recently burst.
The popular OnlyFans model has been left with a flaccid breast that she has dubbed ‘uniboob’ and another 10-kg boob. Following this incident, Mary Magdalene has come to the conclusion that she should remove those implants and leave her breasts at their original size.
“I’m going to go back natural in not only my boobs but other parts of my body, too,” she said on Instagram.
You can put out a dumpster fire, but it’s impossible to un-wreck a train.
Smear of the Week
Crazed Robber Beats Fair Lawn Gas Station Worker, 83, Fights Officers, Smears Feces At HQ
A crazed female robber beat a defenseless 83-year-old gas station employee, fought with Fair Lawn police and then urinated and defecated at headquarters, authorities said.
Sincere Wiley, 30, began arguing with the attendant at the BP station on Wagaraw Road before shoving him, kneeing him in the face and punching him in the eye shortly before 9:30 p.m. Tuesday, Jan. 31, Detective Eric Eleshewich said.
She then brandished a box cutter, grabbed some tobacco product and $88 in cash and ran, the detective said.
Responding officers saw Wiley – who lives in the upstate New York town of Lockport — running from the scene to the nearby Hawthorne Sunoco while dropping the stolen merchandise, Eleshewich said.
Officer Brad Pindyck caught up to Wiley, who struggled before he and his colleagues got her into custody, he said.
Once at headquarters, Wiley refused to remove sharp jewelry or her shoelaces, Eleschewich said.
The 5-foot-5-inch, 180-pound suspect then “became combative,” fighting with and injuring four officers, he said.
She then urinated and defecated in the holding room and smeared feces on the wall, the detective said.
Are they sure that’s a woman?
Name of the Week
Man attempting to urinate on Las Vegas Strip arrested for murder
Police officers running a records check on a man attempting to urinate on the Las Vegas Strip later learned he was wanted for murder, the 8 News Now Investigators have learned.
Mel Gibson, 52, was wanted on a charge of second-degree murder for the death of Jeffrey Hadlock, 56, documents said.
On Monday, Dec. 12, several people called police, saying a man, later identified as Gibson, had knocked out another man, later identified as Hadlock, on Charleston Boulevard near Decatur Boulevard, police said.
At the hospital, doctors diagnosed Hadlock with a skull fracture and brain bleed, police said. Hadlock told officers he was not punched but “was drunk and fell,” documents said. Because of his admission, officers did not follow up on the event until Hadlock died in the hospital on Jan. 2, they said.
Homicide detectives then reviewed surveillance video from a nearby business, which they said showed Gibson hitting Hadlock in the face. Hadlock then fell backward, hitting his head on the ground, they said.
The Clark County coroner’s office later ruled Hadlock’s cause of death as blunt head trauma. The manner of death was listed as homicide.
On Sunday, Jan. 29, Metro police officers on bike control on the Las Vegas Strip saw a man, identified as Gibson, “undo his pants as if he was [sic] going to urinate in a public place,” police said. As police watched Gibson, he turned his head and stopped, they said.
Officers stopped Gibson for engaging in a lewd act in public for attempting to urinate, they said. A records check conducted on the radio found no warrants for his arrest. Officers then released Gibson.
A second records check later found a warrant out for Gibson’s arrest for second-degree murder. About 20 minutes later, officers found Gibson at a gas station east of the Las Vegas Strip on Paradise Road, they said.
Lethal Weapon 5 seems kind of lazy.
Family Circle of the Week
Incest love triangle of mum who tricked son into marriage then wed daughter
Patricia Spann married two of her biological children – and wanted to start a relationship with a third.
The sickening love triangle tore was unintentionally discovered by the authorities, leading to the family being torn apart while mother and daughter were locked up behind bars.
Spann’s eldest son, who claims he attempted to seduce him, described her as “worthless”, “disgusting” and a “predator”.
Spann told investigators she had lost custody of her three kids when they were young, so they were adopted and raised by their paternal grandmother.
When they were adults, Spann got back into contact with her estranged children around 2007.
The three siblings spent a lot of time with Spann, but they had no idea she was their adopted mother as she claimed to be a friend.
She became particularly close with Jody, who had joined the US Army Reserve as a teen, while they were all in Texas.
So much so that in 2008 she married the then 18-year-old, who reportedly was not aware she was his biological mother as her name had been taken off his birth certificate and replaced by his grandma’s.
The horrifying truth was laid bare when the family returned to Oklahoma, when the children’s grandmother revealed Jody’s new wife was actually his mum.
That marriage was annulled by Jody in March 2010 for reasons of ‘incest’, according to reports, but Oklahoma authorities did not press charges.
But the family’s ordeal was not over, as Spann then started another incestuous relationship with her daughter, Misty.
Mother and daughter “hit it off” after they were reunited in 2014 and got married two years later in Oklahoma in March 2016.
Their marriage was annulled in October 2017 at the request of Misty, who cited “illegality and fraud”.
I can’t help but to notice she still has one more child she hasn’t married yet.
Dispute of the Week
Florida man bites off pet python’s head during domestic dispute
Florida man allegedly bit off the head of a pet snake during a domestic dispute. According to Fox News, police arrested Kevin Mayorga on January 30 while responding to reports of a man and a woman arguing in an apartment complex in Miami-Dade County.
On reaching the apartment, police officers heard a man and a woman screaming inside. After several commands to open the door went unheeded, the woman reportedly asked cops to “just kick the door in.”
Kevin Mayorga tried hiding behind a door when cops entered the apartment. He acted aggressively when discovered and refused to come out with his hands up. A police officer tried to taser the 32-year-old but failed to subdue him.
Mayorga even struck an officer in the face with a handcuff while he was being detained, according to the New York Post.
Once he was subdued, the woman told cops that Mayorga had bit off the head of her pet python. The snake was found with its detached head near the front door.
The relationship between Mayorga and the woman is not clear.
Mayorga has been jailed on charges of animal cruelty, false imprisonment and resisting arrest.
Beater, beater, python eater.
Hooter of the Week
Randy psycho owl terrorising UK town and holding residents hostage with savage attacks
A town is living in fear of a randy owl.
The horrid hooter has savaged children, old folk, dog-walkers and their pets – leaving locals scared to leave their homes.
Experts suspect the Canadian great-horned owl is frustrated because it is breeding season and struggling to find love.
They have warned residents of Sedgley, West Midlands, to body-swerve the bolshy bird of prey which is 2ft tall, boasts a 5ft wingspan and has drawn blood in a series of psychotic swoops.
It was first spotted five months ago but has become more vicious.
Liz Hodgkins, 74, was left with deep cuts to her scalp after being savaged by its razor-sharp talons on her driveway. A 13-year-old boy has also been attacked.
While small dogs have been targeted in their owner’s back gardens.
The bird – thought to be an escaped pet – has stepped up its attacks in recent weeks.
It normally feasts on small mammals such as rabbits, ducks, mice and voles – but grandmother-of-five Liz said it took a shine to her as she was shutting her front gates.
The retired lab technician said: “The owl was in the tree and I waved to it and said `hello’.As I was walking back I felt this big hit on the back of the head.
Instead of being horny, maybe the owl is just an asshole.
Wash of the Week
Glam influencer murdered by her dad in honour killing to ‘wash away shame’
A father who drugged and strangled his daughter to death told police he killed her to “wash away the shame” and he might get away with it due to a wild loophole.
The unnamed man is said to have kidnapped Taiba Alali when she returned home to Iraq from where she lives in Turkey to support her country’s football team in the Arabian Gulf Cup in January.
The influencer had agreed to meet her mother at a friend’s house in Baghdad and was astonished when the whole family turned up, before she was reportedly drugged and taken back to the family home in Al-Qadisiyyah Governorate.
When she woke up from the alleged drugging she reportedly rowed furiously with her father, according to local media.
He later came into her room and throttled her to death as she slept, reports added.
Her father – unnamed in local media – turned himself in to the police, telling them he had killed his own daughter to “wash away the shame”.
Police are now investigating him for murder but Iraq’s penal code means he could escape jail by declaring the death an ‘honour killing’.
Under the code, judges are allowed to impose lenient sentences on people who kill for ‘honourable motives’ or under provocation.
In addition to peace, Islam is also the religion of honor.
WTF? of the Week
‘People called me a “freak” due to my 7st leg – but now I love showing it off’
Mahogany Geter was cruelly branded a “freak” by people when she was younger due to her 100lb leg.
However, the aspiring model is now more confident than ever.
The brunette was born with a condition that caused one of her legs to swell to more than seven stone in weight.
And after years of being stared and pointed at, the 25-year-old from Tennessee, US, says she’s discovered the confident “bad b***h” inside her.
Instead of hiding away, Mahogany now proudly shows off her leg on social media and hopes to redefine beauty standards.
Talking about her condition, and people’s reactions, she told the Today Show: “I’ve been told that the devil gave me this disease.
“I’ll get messages about healers that I should work with in other countries.”
She added: “When I’m out in public, people stare at me.
“There’s a lot of pointing — and I’m talking about adults here.
“Kids have the courage to ask me questions.”
Mahogany suffers from long-term condition lymphedema. This causes excess fluid to collect in the body’s soft tissue and cause swelling.
For Mahogany, the swelling on her left side has added 100lb (around 7st) to her total body weight.
As a child, Mahogany said she was trolled even called a “deformed b***h” by a girl at school.
However, her life was turned around when she was approached by a professional photographer who wanted to help her build a modelling portfolio.
She has since used the modelling shoots to raise awareness about lymphedema and hopes to prove conditions shouldn’t get in your way of chasing your dreams.
While she can’t catch those dreams with that leg, she can run in a circle really fast.
