I don’t know what the biggest WTF? this week is, but last week it was me not posting a Week in WTF? I ended up taking my dog to the beach, and by the time I got home, I was too tired. In any case, here’s 2 week’s worth of WTF?:
Headline of the Week
Man feared eaten alive by bear ‘seen with boots in mouth’ as human head found
A man is believed to have been eaten by a bear after it was seen with boots hanging from its mouth and a human head was located nearby.
Police are searching for the angler, Toshihiro Nishikawa, 54, who went missing at a lake in Hokkaido, Japan, earlier this week.
He was dropped off at Lake Shumarinai in Horokanai early Sunday for a spot of solo fishing. Authorities found the head in the area on Monday.
An employee of the boat operator who dropped the man off later saw a bear nearby with waders dangling from its mouth.
They tried to call the 54-year-old on his phone, but there was no answer, Japan Times reported.
This prompted the town office to launch a bear hunt operation and an animal was killed on Monday. The team also found the human head during this operation and investigations are underway to determine whether it’s Nishikawa’s.
The Horokanai town office, which is dealing with the investigation, called the suspected attack “haunting”.
Now he’s bearfooted and bearly needs a hat anymore.
Rating of the Week
Woman ridicules flasher’s penis size as he expose himself to her
AN exposer ‘ran away with hurt pride’ after the woman he flashed ridiculed him for having a penis ‘smaller than those of her dogs’.
Dana Mustapha has been locked up for a series of disturbing incidents in Latchford and the town centre, involving threats and public indecency.
The 34-year-old Iraqi national, who was assisted at Warrington Magistrates’ Court on Thursday, May 11, by a Kurdish interpreter, was charged with three counts of exposure.
He also faced counts of threatening behaviour, assault by beating and two of harassment, one of which put the victim in fear of violence.
Angela Blackmore, prosecuting the case, told the court how in September last year, a man was walking his dog along Knutsford Road in Latchford.
He became aware that the defendant was walking towards him and shouting threats including: “I’m going to f**k you up.”
The victim ignored him but Mustapha followed and continued to shout, before walking away.
A similar incident occurred involving the same complainant on September 6 outside the Co-op store on Knutsford Road, with the defendant making threats while laughing.
Mustapha, despite a number of schoolchildren being in the area, then dropped his trousers and exposed his penis, again laughing.
A further two similar harassment incidents occurred days later, one of which saw him threaten to kick the victim’s dog and cut his throat, as well as use vile homophobic insults.
The final one saw the complainant call a friend who attended and confronted the defendant, who claimed not to understand English.
He detained Mustapha until the police arrived, suffering severe bruising from being kicked, punched and almost headbutted by him after he was told the police were coming.
Mustapha also exposed himself to a woman whom he asked for a cigarette from on September 6 on New Road in Latchford.
As she approached, he removed his penis from his trousers and started to perform a sex act on himself.
The court heard how the woman ‘burst out laughing’ and told him that both her dogs had a bigger penis than him, causing him to ‘run away with hurt pride’.
Islam is the religion of small piece.
Pronouns of the Week
‘SHE’ raped girl with ‘HER’ penis UK court heard, proving country has now gone mad
Can someone please explain to me why a trans rapist, a biological male, who only recently decided to identify as a woman was this week tried as a “woman” and was afforded the courtesy of being referred to throughout the entire trial as Miss Lexi Rose Crawford?
What lunacy is this? This rapist’s name is actually Dominic Risden, from Bristol. And this week he was jailed for nine years for brutally raping his “vulnerable best friend” who has since repeatedly tried to kill herself.
I suppose we should be grateful Risden will be serving his sentence in a male prison where I’m sure he’ll ditch his newly acquired female I.D. for fear of a whole lot more than ridicule.
But why throughout the entire court case did the Judge, and indeed our justice system, afford him the courtesy of being addressed as Miss Lexi Rose Crawford. It’s an insult to the woman he raped. And it’s an insult to our collective intelligence.
And why exactly did the judge allow the farcical situation of allowing evidence to be given about Risden raping “HER” friend with “HER” penis.
This is what you get when you put liberals in charge.
Choker of the Week
Unconscious man rescued with 9 rings ‘strangling’ penis, scrotum
An Australian man had to be hospitalized after passing out with nine metal bands constricting his scrotum following a botched attempt to improve his performance in the boudoir.
Doctors detailed the case study’s “rare case of penile strangulation” — complete with his rescue by firefighters — in the medical journal Urology Case Reports.
The 44-year-old patient was rushed to the emergency room with “nine heavy duty industrial stainless-steel rings stuck around the base of the penis and scrotum” for a whopping 12 hours, according to the study authors.
The unfortunately soul, who was reportedly intoxicated at the time, had reportedly utilized his bizarre bedding bands in a half-baked attempt to maintain an erection during sexual intercourse.
He reportedly passed out following the hanky-panky session, after which he awoke three hours later in “significant pain.”
Following his failed game of ring toss, the sexperimenter reported the hospital in distress and agony.
A subsequent examination revealed that his groin was swollen, tender and bruised, whereupon doctors administered the patient intravenous anesthetics to alleviate his pain from his slinky-esque affliction.
Surgeons then attempted to removed the industrial-strength rings — which measured just 0.4 inches in diameter — using bolt cutters but to no avail.
Left with little other recourse, they enlisted the aid of the local fire-department, who arrived shortly thereafter and cut the rings off with an industrial-grade circular saw while he was under general anesthesia.
There is no remedy for whiskey dick.
Dick of the Week
Oscar Mayer Renames Wienermobile With Something Less Penis-Ish
Times are changing. While you won’t see any obvious visual changes in the iconic Oscar Mayer Wienermobile, it’s technically the Wienermobile no longer. For the first time since the rolling hot dog hit the streets in 1936, it now goes by a new name. Folks, say hello to the Frankmobile.
Why the sudden name change after nearly a century of wienering about the world? According to the official press release from Oscar Mayer’s parent company Kraft Heinz, the Frankmobile rebrand coincides with a new recipe for its 100 percent Beef Franks, the official name for the company’s hot dogs. To mark this occasion, Wienermobile Frankmobile crews will hand out coupons for free hot dogs to anyone named Frank as the motorized mystery-meat machines make their annual tour.
Of course, the elephant in the room is a phallic-shaped vehicle called wiener that drives around the country, often visiting family-themed events. It’s certainly all in good fun, and those who’ve seen the big hot dog in person generally never forget the experience. Oscar Mayer makes no mention of any other motivation for the name change besides the tie-in with its 100-percent Beef Franks. But it’s also no secret that times are changing, for better or worse.
The name change doesn’t stop with the Frankmobile, either. Small wiener whistles often given out by the staff are now Frank Whistles, and speaking of the staff, they’re no longer known as Hotdoggers. Going forward, they’re Frankfurters, which fans of the Rocky Horror Picture Show should absolutely love.
The Bud Light marketing exec would have called it the “Woman’s Penismobile.”
Coverage of the Week
Judge clears trans woman Rachel Glines’ indecent exposure charges due to ‘body fat’ coverage
A Xenia County judge in Ohio ruled that trans woman Rachel Glines did not commit indecent exposure in a female changing room after the defense argued that body fat covered the genitalia area.
Xenia Municipal Court documents originally reported three charges of indecent exposure against Glines, who previously went by the name Darren, since 2021. Witnesses claimed in these incidents that women, including some juveniles, saw a “naked man” in the female locker room with a visible penis. The charges against Glines were then brought to court in February.
Judge David McNamee eventually cleared Glines of these charges, insisting that there was “little dispute as to the facts of the case” regarding Glines’ permission to be in the locker room as well as the fact that Glines’ heavy body set likely covered the penis.
‘There is no question that [Glines] was in the women’s locker room. However, [Glines] was not charged with trespass, nor was [Glines] charged with being in an area of the YMCA where [Glines] was not supposed to be,” McNamee wrote. “Quiet simply, the facts do not exist to support a find of guilt, as charges. Glines’ genitalia was not visible as a result of other portions of her body covering same.”
Sometimes it pays to be disgusting.
Cutter of the Week
Bloke tries to smuggle giant scissors into jail by hiding them in his ‘anal cavity’
A prisoner has been found trying to smuggle a massive pair of scissors into jail via his back passage.
The bizarre discovery was my by officials at the LaPorte County Jail in Indiana, United States.
According to local news outlets, anyone who has been arrested and enters the jail needs to undergo a full body scan.
Normally, not much is found – however the unnamed newly-arrested bloke refused to have the scan at first.
Eventually, having been told that he had no choice, he underwent the scan and officials were left shocked at what the scan showed.
The man had a huge pair of scissors wedged inside his “anal cavity”.
A spokesman for the jail said: “Upon review of the newly scanned image, Lt. Jeff Holt, assistant jail commander of operation noticed the foreign object had moved and he was able to positively identify the object as scissors – still inside the anal cavity of the arrestee.
“The arrestee was escorted from the scanner room to a nearby area for an additional search.”
Thankfully for all involved, the scissors were removed without any damage being caused.
Images of the now-clean pair of scissors show that it is around eight inches long, very sharp and very wide.
This wouldn’t be an issue if the jail would lift their ban on scrapbooking.
Crapper of the Week
Woman defecates, smears feces inside Tri-State hospital chapel
Bond was set at $2,500 for a woman accused of defecating inside the chapel at a Tri-State hospital.
Laura Miniard, of Loveland, was arrested on a felony charge of desecration, according to the complaint from Hamilton County courts.
On May 13, Miniard went into the chapel at Good Samaritan Hospital and defecated on the altar, the court record explains.
She then used the fabric runner on the altar to wipe herself, the court document explains.
Then, according to the court record, Miniard smeared her feces on the altar table using a picture she found inside the chapel.
The court document did not explain why Miniard did what she is accused of doing.
Woman?
Walker of the Week
Topless woman walking dog by beach ‘screamed’ and spewed insults at police when stopped
A topless dogwalker strolling along a city street attracted the attention at authorities, who she then spewed insults at as she was arrested.
She was spotted walking with her pooches along the beach road in Balneário Camboriú, a resort city in the southern Brazilian state of Santa Catarina, on Saturday, May 13.
The woman, who appeared to be in her late twenties, was promptly stopped and then detained by municipal guards before letting out a flurry of abuse.
According to G1, the Municipal Guard reported that the woman did not respond to the agents’ orders and reportedly told police “I’m just walking my dogs”.
“She did not respect and kept walking and uttering offenses against the garrison. The agents carried out the approach, but the woman was very upset”, the body said in a statement.
The Guard further reported that the woman “screamed and caused a disturbance.”
“She received pre-hospital care from the military firefighters, who did not find any injuries. After refusing medical attention, she was referred to the Central Police Station in Balneário Camboriú,” the statement added.
Walking the dog with the puppies hanging out.
Stereotype of the Week
‘I have thickest legs on Instagram – they’re so strong they crush watermelons’
Meet the queen of quads, the diva of delts and the empress of empowerment – Rahki Giovanni.
This fitness influencer isn’t your average Instagram model – she’s a powerhouse of positivity and body love that’s taking the world by storm.
She’s known as having the ‘thickest legs on Instagram’, with thighs ‘so strong they could crush a watermelon’.
However, don’t be fooled by her muscular build – she’s all about self-love and body positivity.
In fact, the Miami-based mum is on a mission to empower women to embrace their curves, stretch marks and cellulite to never let anyone else’s opinion define their self-worth.
In 2015, Rahki embarked on a quest to level up her mental and physical health game.
As a young adult, she was constantly teased for being “too big” and “muscular,” leaving her feeling self-conscious.
She felt the weight of society’s beauty standards bear down on her, leading to some disordered eating and exercise habits.
However, as she matured Rahki started to explore her love for fitness and weightlifting then had an epiphany.
She realised her brawny body was nothing to be ashamed of – and instead she should be proud of it.
“Seven years ago when I started in the fitness industry, there was no one that looked like me,” she said.
“No one of my culture wanted to be ‘thick and fit’ – everyone chose to be slim, so I decided to break the barriers and change the fitness standard.”
Nope.
WTF? of the Week
Illinois crack dealer granted clemency by Obama charged with attempted murder
A former crack cocaine dealer — whose sentence was commuted by former President Barack Obama — is back behind bars for allegedly shooting a car passenger on an Illinois highway, police said.
Alton Mills, 54, who was granted clemency eight years ago, was booked on three attempted murder charges over the shooting that left the victim critically injured, the Illinois State Police announced.
Mills, while inside a car, is accused of firing “multiple shots” at another vehicle on an Interstate 57 ramp Sunday in Posen, a village roughly 30 miles south of Chicago.
“The back-seat passenger in the victim vehicle was struck by gun fire and was transported to an area hospital with life-threatening injuries,” police said.
Mills was being held without bond following his arrest. In 2016, he had his life sentence commuted by Obama after serving 22 years in prison for drug charges.
He was convicted in 1994 on federal charges as part of a crack cocaine conspiracy.
The then-25-year-old Mills had two previous convictions of possession of fewer than five grams of crack cocaine, prompting prosecutors to file a sentence enhancement to lock him in prison without the possibility of parole, according to a previous news release from the Pritzker School of Law at Northwestern University.
Obama chose Mills as one of 95 non-violent federal inmates “who were sentenced at the height of the war on drugs and would likely receive substantially lower sentences today” to have their sentences commuted as part of a clemency initiative.
Thanks Obama.
