The biggest WTF? this week is that democrats and the liberal media insist they need more evidence besides e-mails, texts, bank records, pictures, videos, and a confession as proof of Joe Biden’s corruption. Here’s some WTF? that should be proof enough:
Headline of the Week
Supermarket shut down due to spider that can cause long, painful erections
A supermarket in Austria shuttered this week after a venomous Brazilian wandering spider was spotted wandering in the bananas, TMZ reported, citing fears that a bite from the deadly creature can cause long-lasting, painful erections.
The Penny market in Krems an der Donau — which is about 45 minutes west of Vienna, the nation’s capital — has reportedly been closed since Tuesday.
The store manager allegedly rang the fire department after spotting the 4-inch black-and-red creepy crawly. Helpers sealed the store’s banana crates, but the spider is still at large, per The Mirror.
The Brazilian wandering spider’s venom “stimulates” an erection that lasts for hours, according to Live Science.
Those who are bitten by the spider can suffer high blood pressure and pain throughout their bodies.
“The erection is a side effect that everybody who gets stung by this spider will experience along with the pain and discomfort,” said Dr. Romulo Leite of the Medical College of Georgia, who has studied the spider.
Everybody who is bitten gets a boner?
Flight of the Week
Doctor charged with masturbating in front of 14-year-old girl on a flight while others slept
A Massachusetts doctor has been arrested for allegedly exposing himself and masturbating next to a 14-year-old girl on a flight from Hawaii while other passengers slept.
Dr. Sudipta Mohanty, 33, of Cambridge, was arrested Thursday and accused of performing the lewd act on Hawaiian Airlines Flight 90 from Honolulu to Boston in May last year, the US Attorney’s Office in Massachusetts said.
Mohanty, a primary care physician at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston, was flying with a female companion and seated next to the girl, who was traveling with her grandparents, according to charging documents.
About halfway through the flight, the girl noticed that Mohanty had covered himself with a blanket up to his neck and that his leg was bouncing up and down, the affidavit states.
She then observed that the blanket was no longer covering Mohanty, whose pants were unzipped as he masturbated until ejaculation, according to the filing.
When Mohanty went to the plane’s restroom, the girl moved to an empty seat in another row for the rest of the flight because she felt “disgusted and very uncomfortable,” the filing said.
The accused perv and his companion had earlier been “holding hands and cuddling with each other. They were asking each other ‘basic level’ questions such as, ‘What is your favorite color?’ which (the girl) found strange,” the affidavit says.
After landing in Boston, the girl informed her family about the sickening incident and authorities were notified.
When questioned by two FBI agents at his home, Mohanty “appeared visibly nervous in that his hands and voice trembled,” officials said.
He denied the allegation, saying, “I have no recollection of that.”
Mohanty appeared in federal court in Boston on Thursday after being charged with one count of lewd, indecent and obscene acts while in the special aircraft jurisdiction of the United States.
Sorry, but that doesn’t count as joining the Mile-High Club.
Ass of the Week
Son Facing Charges After Being Shot In The Buttocks By His Father
An Escambia County man was charged after being shot in the buttocks by his father during an argument Wednesday evening
Robert Ryan Palmer, 33, was charged with misdemeanor battery and felony abuse of a disabled person.
Deputies arrived at the home on Peakview Drive off Guidy Lane to find Palmer face down on a laundry room floor screaming that he was bleeding out and going to die. He was transported to Sacred Heart Hospital for treatment where he was medically cleared and taken to jail.
Palmer came to the home intoxicated, belligerent and asking for money, according to an arrest report. He reportedly slapped his mother “upside the head” before trying to attack his father. The father, who has an amputated leg, attempted to defend himself before Palmer took his cane and hit the father in the face, the report continues.
In fear for his life, the father aimed his gun at Palmer’s hip and fired, the ECSO said.
Palmer remained in the Escambia County Jail Thursday without bond.
Once again, the one-legged man prevails in an ass-kicking contest.
Asshole of the Week
A Connecticut woman developed massive ulcer in her rectum that occurs in just one in 20,000 people after eating ‘excessive’ amounts of sunflower seeds.
The unnamed woman, 31, sought medical help after losing 20 pounds in a month and experiencing severe diarrhea.
When doctors ran scans of her abdomen and pelvis, they found that an undigested sunflower seed was lodged in her rectum.
The woman had developed a rectal seed bezoars – an extremely rare hard solid mass.
Bezoars are collections of partially digested or undigested materials that get stuck in the gastrointestinal tract.
This happens when the foreign material accumulates in the colon and rectum, causing it to dehydrate and harden. This leads to masses, impacted stool, and anal pain.
Most of these are lodged in the stomach or small intestine.
Bezoars often don’t cause any symptoms, however, in this woman’s case, she had impacted stool, rectal pain, and constipation.
The medical team said that it was likely from eating ‘excessive’ amounts of sunflower seeds. It’s unclear exactly how many she ate.
The doctors also did not specify if the seeds were still in their shells, but as most of these similar cases have involved unshelled seeds, it’s safe to assume these ones still had them.
Only two or three cases of bezoars are reported every year.
Watermelon seeds are the most common cause of bezoars, followed by sunflower seeds.
This is why spitting is better than swallowing.
Poo of the Week
Surgeons extract gigantic 3ft python-shaped poo from constipated woman
A woman may have just laid claim to having done the biggest poo of all time.
Surgeons have been left horrified after removing the giant log from the 53-year-old patient – identified only as Hua – who claimed she’d been backed up for years.
She was left desparate for help and begged medics at Zhejiang University First Hospital in eastern China to help her drop the giant kid off at the pool.
She said she was left barely able to get out of bed because the pain being caused by bloating in her stomach was so great.
Hua had been having issues with constipation for years – but it was a particular situation that couldn’t be sorted with laxatives that left her needing medical attention.
She had been in the sorry state for 10 days.
According to reports from local media, she looked pregnant she was so bloated by the time she showed up at the hospital.
Pressure had built up inside her body because of the enormous mass which had in turn made her breathing difficult.
Loved ones were able to feel the rock-hard turds inside her stomach by giving it a poke, and subsequently urged her to get help as quickly as possible.
When the monster poo was finally removed, docs found that one part was roughly the same size as a football.
The jumbo dump that was finally removed and found to weigh 44 lbs, or 20 kilogrammes, and had been hardened by the body.
Hospital reports claim surgeons said it looked like a three-foot-long python, but Hua is now understood to be on the road to recovery.
Too much Dung Pao Shrimp.
Dog Do of the Week
A Michigan woman was arrested this week for performing a sex act on her dog after her ex discovered disturbing footage of the encounter on security cameras and turned it over to cops.
Brittany McClure, 30, was arrested for sodomy and animal abuse for the alleged assault of the couple’s dog Max, Fox 2 Detroit reported.
The woman’s ex-boyfriend found a video of her performing the act on their dog while reviewing footage on surveillance cameras he set up in the living room of their shared home in Taylor, according to the outlet.
Police said that the man turned the upsetting six minutes of footage over to investigators.
“[It was] plain as day: his ex-girlfriend performing fellatio on their dog named Max and her attempts to get Max to reciprocate,” Lt. Frank Canning said. “Kind of an interest in fetish stuff that was seen on the internet. I don’t know that any justification could justify these acts. She did own up to performing these acts on Max.”
McClure told cops that the caught-on-camera beastality was the only time she did sex acts with their dog.
“In that video, it shows defendant Brittany McClure lying on the living room floor on a mattress with a blanket. She opens the blanket and calls the dog over,” Taylor Det. Philip Collop said in court on Wednesday, according to Fox 2. “She is heard saying ‘good boy’.”
Positive reinforcement is important in dog training.
Vegetable of the Week
Mom refuses to get rid of her daughter’s head lice because she’s vegan
Usually, when your child gets head lice, you desperately try every method to try and kill them, ASAP.
But one Aussie mom has taken the opposite approach — she doesn’t want to harm the nits AT ALL.
According to a concerned parent who wrote in an advice column, her neighbor won’t treat her daughter’s lice because she’s vegan – and vegans don’t kill living things.
She explains: “My seven-year-old daughter is best friends with the girl next door, whose family are vegan. That’s fine; we respect their choice… my problem is that recently this otherwise delightful child was at our house and scratching furiously, and I discovered she was crawling with head lice.”
After mentioning the nits to the girls’ mom, the mom said she was aware of them but didn’t want to harm them as vegans don’t kill living things.
“She told me she was in the practice of combing the lice and nits into the garden where they had the best chance of survival,” the poster continued, “and my jaw hit the floor.”
She then asked the advice columnist what she should do now. “I don’t want to separate the kids but there’s no way ‘combing them into the garden’ is going to work (industrial-grade pesticide barely works) and I don’t want my daughter covered in vermin.”
The agony aunt told the poster what she really thought – that the other mom was a “sanctimonious twit.”
She then went on to say she was actually a “monster” who was condemning the nits to a “slow and painful” death as they wouldn’t be able to survive in the garden.
Leeches, tapeworms, ticks, viruses, and fungi are all living things too.
WTF? of the Week
Barack Obama told ex, ‘I make love to men daily, but in the imagination,’ letter shows
Former President Barack Obama wrote of his own “androgynous” mind and “mak[ing] love to men daily, but in my imagination,” according to the redacted portion of a now-notorious 1982 letter, obtained by The Post.
The more than 40-year-old letter to an ex-girlfriend recently resurfaced after Obama biographer David Garrow gave a long and winding interview on the one-time commander-in-chief.
“In regard to homosexuality, I must say that I believe this is an attempt to remove oneself from the present, a refusal perhaps to perpetuate the endless farce of earthly life. You see, I make love to men daily, but in the imagination,” Obama, then 21, wrote to Alex McNear in November 1982.
“My mind is androgynous to a great extent and I hope to make it more so until I can think in terms of people, not women as opposed to men. But, in returning to the body, I see that I have been made a man, and physically in life, I choose to accept that contingency,” he added.
McNear, who dated Obama during his year at Occidental College in Los Angeles, later redacted the salacious paragraphs, which the Pulitzer- Prize-winning historian Garrow hunted down and included in his tome, “Rising Star.”
The letter is currently owned by Emory University, which doesn’t permit it to be photographed or removed. Instead, Garrow’s friend Harvey Klehr transcribed the paragraphs by hand and sent them to the author.
There is nothing imaginary about Michelle’s unsightly bulge.
