This is not a joke, people. Fox News is claiming that Crazy Joe Biden could defeat Donald Trump in the 2020 presidential election. Why? Well because the conservative news network has themselves a bonafide progressive liberal whacko and this is the kind of stuff lefties fantasize about. CNN and MSNBC have “conservatives” who are more liberal than the liberal networks, but Fox decided to get themselves a real liberal for some genuine balance. Either that or they thought it would be hilarious, which it is.
Leslie Marshall is a commentator on Fox who provides, “analysis on both political and social issues from a liberal point of view” because there seriously isn’t enough liberal points of view on TV already. Just in case you aren’t sure she’s a real liberal and Fox is trying to pull one over, this should be enough evidence for you: I’ve found the Democratic candidate who can defeat Trump in 2020
I have a confession to make. I wasn’t sure Hillary Clinton would beat Donald Trump in the 2016 presidential election.
Sure, I supported Clinton, wanted her to be our president and cried for about three days in the fetal position when she lost – but I wasn’t entirely shocked that Trump won.
She curled up in a ball and cried for 3 days because her candidate lost an election? Yeah, she’s liberal alright. You know what I did in 2008 and 2012 when my candidate lost? The same thing I do every day, but I’m emotionally strong enough to not take the will of the American people as a personal attack.
Further proving her liberal credentials, Marshall shows how stupid she thinks Republican voters are:
For years I have seen my own Democratic Party support very intelligent candidates who seem a bit too highbrow for mainstream America.
John Kerry was a very eloquent, intelligent and polished speaker who I felt wiped the floor with George W. Bush in all three of their presidential candidate debates.
I also believed Hillary Clinton was more professional and had more political knowledge and intellect than Trump, and I concluded – as polls reported most people felt – that she won each presidential candidate debate hands down.
But the American people in both of those elections seemed to feel more comfortable voting for a guy they’d like to have a beer with.
Did you catch that? In Marshall’s elitist opinion, the problem with democrats is they are just too damn smart and Americans are dumb so they vote for idiots. The good news is, Marshall thinks she knows a democrat who is dumb enough to appeal to stupid American voters:
As a Democrat, I not only want a good strong candidate to run against President Trump. I want someone who’ll win. That someone, in my opinion, is former Vice President Joe Biden.
I’ll agree with Marshall that Biden is a big dope, but as for his prospects of winning against Trump? The dude has never even made it out of the democratic primaries in his multiple attempts at running for president, plus he’s certifiably insane. He has no chance.
Why does Marshall think Biden could beat Trump in 2020? Well, because of his wit:
Thinking back to the three presidential debates between Hillary Clinton and Trump, it would have been an entirely different ball game if it we had seen a debate between Biden and Trump.
Trump wouldn’t have been able to physically stand over Biden as he did with Clinton – and he wouldn’t have dared, in my opinion.
For every insult, joke and one-liner Trump would have tossed, Biden would have hurled two back. Biden, much like Trump, is bold, brash and shoots from the hip. Or as he puts it, he believes in “no malarkey.”
Biden is known for his embarrassing gaffes, not his witty comebacks and zingers. He once told a a handicapped man in a wheelchair to stand up and be recognized. He thought it was funny to joke about how it’s mandatory to be from India to work at 7-11. He asked a group of reporters if they had seen his “butt buddy” and was completely serious. The best way to beat Biden in a debate is to sit back and let him talk.
Marshall finished this ridiculous piece with some more liberalism by bashing those dreaded white men:
I know many Democrats – especially women like me – are sick of seeing the United States run by another old white guy. But Biden is the old white guy who I believe can make Donald Trump a one-term president.
Spoken like a true liberal: white men are bad, but only if they aren’t our white men. The same goes for sexual predators.
While I don’t agree with Marshall that Biden could beat Trump, I do share her enthusiasm for Biden running in 2020. As insane as that guy is, it would make the election season very entertaining. I honestly don’t believe Biden will run but the good news is democrats have nothing but lunatics, so whoever they put up promises to deliver nothing but laughs.
