Stacey Abrams Guarantees She’ll be President In 2040

Neither Mad Max, The Terminator, nor The Matrix came close to describing the horrors of the dystopian future Stacey Abrams has in mind. The woman famous for refusing to concede the 2018 Georgia gubernatorial election is guaranteeing she will be President of the United States in 2040. I think I speak for everyone when I say that Agent Smith, a liquid metal T-1000 Terminator, or the Lord Humungous would be far more preferable than woke revolutionary Aunt Jemima.

Abrams did and interview with FiveThirtyEight, because on the left this sorest of sore losers is a heroic cult figure. She was asked about her presidential aspirations:

“Do you think the country will elect a woman president in the next 20 years?” reporter Clare Malone asked.

“Yes, absolutely,” Abrams replied.

“Do you think it will elect a black woman?” asked Malone.

“Yes, absolutely,” said Abrams.

“Do you think they’ll elect you?” Malone asked.

“Yes, I do. That’s my plan. And I’m very pragmatic,” Abrams replied.

Pragmatic means: dealing with things sensibly and realistically in a way that is based on practical rather than theoretical considerations.

Stacey Abrams lost the 2018 Georgia Governors race to Republican Brian Kemp. She has, to this day, refused to concede this election, which means she considers herself the rightful Governor of Georgia. In fact she frequently declares that she won. Clearly this is not dealing with things in a sensible way.

The reason why she won’t concede is because she says Kemp, who was the Georgia Secretary of State, purged the voter rolls and suppressed the vote, stealing her victory away. Kemp was required by the state constitution, a law passed by democrats, to purge voter roles and voter turnout in the 2018 election was a historic high. Clearly this in not dealing with things in a realistic way.

The question is: why is Abrams waiting until 2040 to become President of the United States? She can simply declare herself the POTUS right now and will be every bit as legitimate as her Georgia governorship.

And actually, that may present a problem 20 years from now. If she never concedes the 2018 election that will make her governor for life and stop her from becoming president. She cannot hold two offices simultaneously. Eventually she’s going to have to admit that she didn’t win.

Abrams didn’t give details of her plan to become president in 2040, but I think she’ll use the Hillary Clinton model with some fantasy enhancements. First she’ll declare herself Brain kemp’s wife, making herself first lady of a Southern state. Then she’ll declare herself Donald Trump’s “real” wife, becoming FLOTUS. After that, she’ll declare herself the U.S. Senator in state that she has never lived before.

In 2024, when Nikki Haley is elected President, Abrams will declare herself Secretary of State to bolster her foreign policy credentials for a run at the White House. After declaring herself resigned form the State Department for Haley’s second term, Abrams will get the liberal media to declare her a shoe-in for president before she even officially announces her candidacy.

At this point, it’s only 2032, so Abrams is going to have to sit around on her fat ass for 8 years before eventually running in 2040. Now here’s how she succeeds where Hillary Clinton failed: she simply declares herself the winner and BOOM the first black female president of the United States!

Sure, this plan is not perfect. A lot can god wrong in 20 years. A great war could turn the entire planet into the Australian Outback. The machines could become self-aware. Humans could be turned into batteries powering the Matrix.

The brilliance however of Abram’s guarantee of a victory in 2040 is that she has a full 2 decades before everyone laughs in her fat face for losing again.