Look out! Canada is getting tough with us. A major Canadian newspaper has warned that Donald Trump or one of his “acolytes” may take the White House in 2024 and is suggesting the country will do something to stop that from happening. What? Who knows? It seems highly unlikely that the wussiest country in the world is going to do anything but complain.
We’re only a few days into the new year and there’s already a contender for funniest tweet of 2022:
If the next presidential election reveals the U.S. hurtling toward possible violence and autocracy, should Canada try to intervene? https://t.co/4GcnQskumH
— The Globe and Mail (@globeandmail) January 2, 2022
This thing is behind a paywall but the Internet provides everything for free so they can suck on their shitty business model:
But a large minority of American voters appear to have lost faith in their political system, egged on by media organizations, such as Fox News, that stoke and profit from that alienation. Supporters of former president Donald Trump are ascendant within the Republican Party, and appear determined to secure victory in the next election by hook or by crook.
If Mr. Trump, or one of his Republican acolytes, wins the 2024 presidential election – either legitimately or by manipulating the results at the state level – what will be left of the judiciary, the public service and a constitutionally constrained military after four more years? And how will their most fervent supporters react if the Republicans lose?
Typically, when asked about American presidential elections, Canadian prime ministers say they look forward to working with whoever wins. But that may not cut it this time. The 2024 American president election could greatly influence this country’s future. Do we just stand by and watch?
Okay, what are you gonna do, Canada? Justin Trudeau, the current Canadian prime minister, will still hold that position in 2024 when a non-democrat will be elected President of the United States. He’s the beta male leader of a beta female country. Can anyone imagine him doing anything other than getting slapped in the face with a huge pair of American balls and then asking for more?
Even if Canada had someone in charge who is a little more assertive than milquetoast Trudeau, what exactly would that person do? Launch buckets of hot maple syrup across the border?
This Globe and Mail piece suggests that Canada should step even if a Republican wins the White House legitimately, making this even more idiotic. If Canada was so concerned about someone illegitimately winning the U.S. presidency, why didn’t they speak up about Joe Biden in 2020? Here’s the thing, I guarantee you that plenty of Canadians illegally voted for Biden in the 2020 election.
Worst case scenario is that Canada retaliates against a Republican winning a free and fair 2024 presidential election by recalling its liberal comedians and actors. I could live in a world without Jim Carrey and Seth Rogan. In fact, that would be a pretty good campaign strategy for 2024: Vote for the Republican and Ryan Gosling is gone for good.
Canada threatening America is like … I actually can’t think of anything less menacing. Maybe it’s like quadruple amputee threatening to kick your ass. It’s both funny and sad at the same time.
