Joe Biden was literally in Asia last week but the White House decided he didn’t embarrass our country enough so they sent Kamala Harris to finish the job. Apparently the illegitimate vice president doesn’t care much for the local cuisine so she served up some of her famous word salads.
The recipe for a Kamaltoe word said is pretty simple: find a word or phrase and beat it to death. In Thailand she made a “significance” salad with a “discussions” vinaigrette dressing:
“This is my third trip to the Indo-Pacific region as vice president and really um it signifies the significance of the relationship between the United States and our allies,” said Harris, adding, “The discussions that we had included, in large part, a discussion about the significance of the climate crisis.”
That’s significantly less significant than the signifiers she had previously signified, which in of itself is significantly significant.
In the Philippines she made a dry fat-free “rights” salad:
“I think it’s important to start with a perspective of knowing, not just believing, but knowing you’re born with rights. You’re born with these rights. You’re not asking someone to do you the favor through the benevolence of their existence to grant you these rights. They are your rights, God given, and it’s always important to remember that in the fight for human rights and then to remember therefor there’s a universality to those rights,” Harris said.
Is there some reason why she pronounces the word “rights” as “riots”? Maybe she’s trying to encourage Filipinos to riot like she did in America during the Sumer of Floyd destruction.
Later, also in the Philippines, Harris made a “joy” salad with a creamy cringy dressing:
“Never let anyone take your joy from you. I call myself a joyful warrior. Right? Never let anyone take your joy from you,” said Harris.
I guess that explains why she’s always either cackling inappropriately or on the verge of bursting out in laughter, even when the subject matter is grave. As a “joyful warrior” she is incapable of taking anything seriously.
This last one isn’t a word salad but it is an awkward situation made more awkward by the unserious joyful warrior:
Some young Filipinos did a dance for Harris and then she just didn’t really know what to make of it.
“Thank you, I’m so happy to see you. What a warm welcome,” said Harris.
The young dancers looked at Harris like she was some kind of freak and there was a long awkward silence. Finally, Harris said, “Are you gonna keep dancing?”
Harris thought this was hilarious and laughed as she looked around nervously, hoping someone would jump in to rescue her. Eventually, a teacher or someone in charge said something and the kids started dancing again.
I bet what ever the instructor said was something like, “American weirdo is unimpressed with your dance. Do it again!”
The Asian leaders who met with Kamala Harris must have been equally unimpressed. Sure, Joe Biden is a hot mess himself, but at least his name tag says “president.” Getting the vp, especially Kamalatoe, is like getting a participation trophy; it’s meaningless and insulting.
