This week’s biggest WTF? is that even the Supreme Court doesn’t care about facts when it comes to the blatant election theft that illegitimately gave Joe Biden the presidency. Here’s some other WTF? facts that shouldn’t be ignored:
Headline of the Week
EMU professor accused of sending picture of penis to former student
An Eastern Michigan professor is accused of sending unwanted pictures of his penis to a former student plus another graphic email asking her to perform an act for him.
Former student Destinee Hayes has filed a notice of a plan to sue EMU for sexism and racial discrimination for the alleged emails from the 65-year-old professor.
According to Hayes, in June of this year, she emailed the professor for a letter of recommendation. On Aug. 22, she said she received several unwanted responses from his university email account.
Hayes said one of the emails was a picture of his penis and another said “show me your p*** baby.”
Hayes said she immediately reported to the Title IX Coordinator for EMU but, as of Dec. 8, 2020, the coordinator has not responded to her regarding an investigation. She said the professor is still employed by EMU.
Hayes hired attorney Detroit attorneys Maurice Davis and Jasmin Rand to represent her in the lawsuit. She said she’s planning legal action to protect other women and doesn’t believe she’s the only e one he’s sent images like this to.
“I hired my attorneys to fight for me and the other women that this professor has most likely victimized. I do not believe that this is the first time he sent a student pornographic images. I am extremely disappointed in my alma mater Eastern Michigan University for not firing him. I refuse to remain silent while this man is still employed and left to victimize other women,” Hayes said in a statement.
Davis and Rand said EMU’s lack of action in failing to fire the professor defies logic
Hayes is demanding that the EMU professor be replaced with an OSTRICH professor, who are known to be less sexist and racist.
Fireman of the Week
‘Photographed naked, forced to wear wig’: CFA firefighter sues over bullying claim
A Country Fire Authority veteran who claims to have been photographed naked, ridiculed, labelled ‘bitch for the day’ and forced to wear a wig by his superiors is taking the volunteer rural fire service to court.
Darren Scott Cogger, from north-east Victoria, claims that between July 2009 and June 2018 he was subject to multiple episodes of bullying, including having his testicles whipped as he emerged from a shower and being ordered to strip naked and march as others took photos and ridiculed him.
The career firefighter claims in his writ that superior officers at the CFA ordered him to participate in a competitive drill requiring the loser to wear a blonde wig and be the “bitch for the day”, as well as being yelled at in the face while being ordered to stand to attention.
Mr Cogger, 48, claims that when he suspected he was exposed to asbestos in July 2013, he was ridiculed for reporting the exposure and mocked over fears of absorbing the cancerous substance.
The Supreme Court writ says the bullying also included having articles such as a portable radio and map folder “thrown aggressively” at him.
With this complaint, he seems like he’s running for “Bitch of the Year.”
Spiderman of the Week
MISLEADING: Bite from Brazilian spider causes four-hour erection
A viral photo claiming that a bite from a Brazilian spider causes an erection lasting up to four hours is misleading.
The photo, widely shared in WhatsApp groups, encouraged those with an erection disorder to try the spider to up their performance.
This came up following an online publication claiming that the species contains a possible breakthrough for erectile dysfunction.
“Most people who find a spider in their bedroom quickly try to get rid of it. But new research shows that one arachnid might actually be best kept by your bedside. A single bite from the Brazilian wandering spider has been shown to have side effects including a four-hour-long erection,” read part of the article.
But Urologist Dr. Peter Mungai said an erection occurs when a man becomes sexually aroused allowing hormones, muscles, nerves, and blood vessels to work together.
Mungai said penile erection involves neuron stimulation and production of hormones which has nothing to do with a spider bite.
“This is just a good joke because a spider cannot produce the hormones or neurons needed to stimulate a penile erection,” he said.
“If it is true that such information is doing rounds then it could be by some sadists who do not understand the mechanism of erection,” he added.
He’s right. There’s nothing funnier that a spider bite on the wang.
Jughead of the Week
Riverdale High students report man exposed, pleasured himself in school parking lot
A group of female Riverdale High School students reported a man exposing and pleasuring himself in the high school’s parking lot after school hours.
The Lee County Sheriff’s Office says the incident happened Thursday afternoon.
Several girls told a deputy a man was parked in the parking lot and was seen pulling out his genitals and stimulating himself in full view of everyone nearby. Families are concerned with what has happened.
The girls said it didn’t appear the suspect was “performing the act lasciviously” by trying to get their attention, speaking with them or staring at anyone, but they “just thought law enforcement should know.” The girls declined to provide any written statements or further information.
While the deputy was speaking with the girls, he was told by dispatch that the original complainant currently across the street at the Riverdale Branch Library, so deputies went to speak with her.
The victim said she pulled into the school’s parking lot to pick up her sister at 4 p.m., and she saw a man in the driver’s seat of a truck. When her sister arrived, the victim said she pulled out of her parking spot and noticed the man had pulled his genitals from his pants and was pleasuring himself. She said he looked her in the eyes while doing so, so she quickly backed out of her spot and left.
A cheerleading coach at the school told deputies she also spoke with the girls about the incident. Gremore describes it as a “devastating” experience.
These Archie comics are getting really dark.
Mughead of the Week
MAN IN JAIL AFTER OFFICER SAYS HE WAS EXPOSING GENITALIA AND STEPPING INTO TRAFFIC
54-year-old Timothy Scott was charged with indecent exposure, public intoxication, and disorderly conduct after an officer said he saw him block a group of people on a sidewalk and expose his genitalia before stepping in front of a moving patrol car.
On November 25th, Metro Nashville Police Officer James Hill was driving on 3rd Avenue North when he observed Timothy Scott walking along the sidewalk. According to the affidavit, Scott approached a group of 5-7 people, began to yell and wave his arms around blocking their path. The officer also noted Scott appeared to have exposed his genitals to these people. Officer Hill was forced to slam on his brakes when Scott walked into the roadway.
Once Scott was detained, he was observed to have red watery eyes, erratic movements, and the strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from him. Scott was determined to be a danger to others due to his extreme level of intoxication and disorderly conduct.
Apparently the new school crossing guard is not working out.
Prick of the Week
University lecturer is stunned when hackers doodle genitals across her Shakespeare presentation
A university lecturer was stunned when hackers doodled genitals across her Shakespeare presentation during a Q&A session with students.
Dr Sarah Olive had been putting forward her linguistics research to a class of dozens at the University of York when the lecture was suddenly sabotaged.
The senior lecturer had been talking for 50 minutes when she spotted the red pen tracing across the screen.
The 38-year-old then took a screengrab for evidence – before watching in disbelief as the pranksters ‘started drawing hairs on the balls’.
Dr Olive is adamant that the offensive ‘penis graffiti’ was the work of hackers as she ‘knew no one in the seminar would draw a c**k and balls over her presentation’.
The academic claims she felt more disappointed and annoyed for the students then upset about her work being defaced with the ‘misogynistic’ cartoon.
However she believes the hackers could be both sexist and racist as the slides had images of young Asian women on them – and she doubts they would have done it on a male’s lecture.
‘I think there’s a sexist, misogynistic element to it. The voices were male voices.
‘I think drawing male genitalia on slides that a woman is presenting, that have pictures of young Asian women on them, is potentially both sexist and racist.
‘Is this happening to male professors? I think that’s what worries and saddens me about it.
‘It seems like it’s targeted at silencing [or] speaking over women. Or trying to scare women and make them anxious.
William Shakespeare = Willie Wigglepenis. Get over it. Also, not a red pen and there’s no hair on the balls.
Dick of the Week
Indecent exposure at Dicks Sporting Goods
Police are investigating a case of indecent exposure at an Eastern Carolina Dicks Sporting Goods store.
Jacksonville police this evening released a surveillance photo of a man who they say is a person of interest in the exposure.
It happened back on November 30th at the sporting good store on Western Boulevard.
The man is in his mid to late 20s, about 5′10 to 6′ tall. He was wearing a white t-shirt, a blue jean jacket, and blue jeans. Police say he was driving a black Dodge Challenger with black rims and dark tinted windows.
Police say suspect may have also exposed himself at Chock Full ‘O Nuts.
Gas Leak of the Week
Can Holding In a Fart Cause It to Leak Out of Your Mouth?
Nearly everyone has been in a situation where passing gas would be embarrassing. Choosing to “hold in” or delay flatulence from escaping is often the polite thing to do. But holding in a fart for too long isn’t good for your body.
If you decide not to release a fart, some of the gas will be reabsorbed into the circulatory system. From there, it goes to the lungs for a gas exchange throughout the pulmonary circulation system and is expelled through breathing.
While this isn’t a “mouth fart,” per se, it’s the gas from the fart coming out of your mouth.
Farts, also called flatus, are a natural part of your digestive process. Bacteria in your intestines create gases as they break down and metabolize the food that you eat. These gases expand your colon, giving you a feeling of fullness and discomfort. The gas needs a place to escape, and usually, it’s through your rectum.
When you block a fart from escaping, some of the gas can pass through your gut wall and be reabsorbed into your bloodstream. From there, it can end up being exhaled through your lungs, coming out of your mouth via exhaling.
To avoid “butt breath” and “skunk lung,” let ‘er rip every time.
Ass Leak of the Week
Channel 19 Gets Results, Helps Nab Culprit Who Was Raining Poop on Downtown Cleveland
Dealing with a metaphorical and existential shit storm is bad enough; Clevelanders shouldn’t be forced to also live through a literal one.
That bold proclamation was the kernel of a recent story by Channel 19, which found that in its very own corner of downtown Cleveland, poop had been raining unceremoniously down from the heavens.
“Raining poop,” one neighbor in a nearby building told the station. “Literally, and you could see it on the sidewalk.”
And it was coming from the Reserve Square Apartments.
“Then one day I seen turds, and that’s when I knew somebody was sweeping feces off the balcony,” he said. “It has fell on residents over here at Bohn Tower. It has fallen on the people that were waiting at the bus stop. It’s not just frustrating – it really angers the hell out of me, to be honest, and I think we have the right as simply citizens to be able to walk without feces falling on us.”
Which is where Channel 19 comes into the picture.
Smirk and shake your head, but there are few easier ways to get a simple but shocking problem fixed than by calling your local TV station. The intrepid I-teams and Action teams and Troubleshooter teams, equipped with dramatic voice overs and video, can do things plain-ass words and pictures never will.
Like catching the poop offender sluicing downtown Cleveland with pee juice while reporting the story.
It took less than 48 hours after reporters first inquired about the situation for K&D to identify the tenant dumping dog shit onto unsuspecting innocents below and power wash the sidewalk.
How is this any different than Cleveland normally is?
Beehive of the Week
Bees defeat ‘murder hornet’ relatives with poop
Giant hornets such as the enormous “murder hornet” and others in the Vespagenus, are highly aggressive and deadly beehive invaders. However, Asian honey bees can defend themselves against these insect predators by smearing animal feces around the hive entrance.
When giant hornets target a beehive, they attack as a group and overwhelm the colony. But Asian honey bees (Apis cerana) that are under attack by the giant hornet Vespa soror, a close relative of the murder hornet Vespa mandarinia, can often prevent hornet attacks by collecting and applying animal waste to their doorways, new research finds.
This poop defense is “next level” for honey bees, which typically rely exclusively on plants for everything they need to survive, said Heather Mattila, an associate professor in the Department of Biological Sciences at Wellesley College in Wellesley, Massachusetts, and lead author of a new study on this unusual bee behavior.
“This dung defense is pretty sophisticated; it takes multiple workers to execute it,” Mattila told Live Science.
The poop defense was a solid one. Hives with lots of fecal spotting had fewer visits from giant hornets, which seemed unwilling to chew on or rub up against poop-covered entrances. Hives that the bees anointed with poop were never successfully overrun by giant hornets, according to the study.
It won’t however keep the Jehova Witnesses away.
Behave of the Week
PATIENT AT SKYLINE CUFFED FOR OUTSTANDING WARRANT; DEFECATES IN PATROL CAR EN ROUTE TO BOOKING
44-year-old Lisa Stewart was charged with assault of an officer and resisting arrest after she spat a chewed cigarette in an officer’s face and defecated inside the patrol car on the way to booking.
On December 2nd, Metro Nashville Police officers arrived at Skyline Hospital due to Lisa Stewart having an active warrant. Lisa was in the hospital due to a previous domestic incident. When Lisa was released from the hospital, officers placed her in handcuffs. Lisa believed they were not helping with her domestic situation and became aggressive. Officers stated that she asked to smoke a cigarette but was denied, at which point she chewed the cigarette that was in her mouth and spit it on an officer’s face.
Officers reported they tried to place Lisa in the back of a patrol vehicle, but she remained stiff and would not sit down. When they secured her in the back seat of the vehicle, she repeatedly hit her head on the glass and kicked the door of the vehicle. A leg restraint was put on her to avoid damaging the vehicle, then Lisa told officers she would defecate inside the patrol car. While transporting her to jail, officers claimed Lisa pulled her pants down and defecated inside the squad car.
Can’t say she didn’t warn them.
Kicker of the Week
Frustrated Mom Kicks Son’s Corpse
Infuriated that her son had not heeded her many warnings, an elderly woman yesterday landed a kick to his corpse, shocking onlookers, including law enforcement personnel, at the crime scene.
“Look how long me a talk to you and you nah hear. See it deh, police kill yuh,” the mother reportedly said as she wailed.
She was then whisked away from the scene at Ali Lane, off Slipe Pen Road in Kingston, where she had gone to identify the body after her son was reportedly killed after engaging the police in a shoot-out.
The body of 36-year-old Rushane Thomas was fished from a gully, where he was reportedly found clutching a firearm.
Reports from the police are that about 12:30 p.m., they entered a premises on Mulgrave Avenue. When they went to the back, they saw three men in a gully, which runs behind the house.
The police called out to the men, who reportedly opened gunfire.
The Gleaner understands the fire was returned and Thomas fell while the other men ran.
Ain’t no Dindu Nuffins in Jamaica.
Cruller of the Week
Florida man arrested for beating and throwing chair at child in doughnut dispute
A Florida man is being charged with child cruelty and damaging property after allegedly beating a child and throwing a chair at him after a dispute over doughnuts.
The incident happened on March 19, according to WEAR-TV.
Derrick Beasley, 34, told the child’s mother the boy was throwing things around the house so he beat him for discipline, according to the station. The child told another version of events, stating Beasley thought he broke into a room and stole a woman’s doughnuts.
He also said Beasley beat him with a belt, threw a chair at him, pulled him out of the closet he was hiding in, and kicked him in the stomach…
An Escambia County Sheriff Office arrest report said the boy had welts and scratches on his arms and back.
Don’t f*ck with Bid D’s doughnuts, yo.
WTF? of the Week
‘Sit on Satan’s Lap’ fundraising event draws different reactions
A local art group is trying to raise money for pandemic relief, but how they’re doing it is amusing some and outraging others. You might remember a Jeffrey Epstein statue that was placed outside of Albuquerque’s City Hall months ago. It stirred up a lot of controversy. The local art group, Antlion Entertainment Art Collective, told KRQE News 13 it was a satirical political statement. And now, they’re back at it again.
“There was actually a typo, a clerical error and I just kind of rolled with it because everyone needs the money, money is tight right now,” said the artist behind the fundraiser. He wants to be identified as Satan.
The artist said their event ‘Sit on Satan’s Lap’ will take place at the University of New Mexico’s Johnson Field on December 19 to raise money for the aid organization, Direct Relief, which provides global humanitarian medical help. “They’re hosting an event where I will be behind a barrier with only my knee exposed and so children can sit on my lap and get what they want for Christmas because Santa is hiding out like a coward and I’m willing to step up to the plate,” said the artist, Satan.
On the event’s description posted on social media, it says: “How many people have been saved by prayer? Zero. How many have been saved by wearing a mask? 130,000”. It also says: “Don’t send thoughts and pray. Donate $6.66 today.”
Meet Joe Biden’s nominee for Surgeon General.
