Following the illegitimate president’s disastrous pullout of Afghanistan, “F*ck Joe Biden!” became a movement. They chant it at football games, it’s on yard signs, and it’s trending on social media. Unlike Afghanistan, which Biden took weeks to address, Joe was quick to respond to the FJB movement. According to him, you should stop because “F*ck Joe Biden!” makes the victims of 9/11 sad or something.
Biden tried to make Afghanistan and the U.S. casualties he caused all about him by invoking his dead son Beau, who definitely didn’t die in combat. He really wanted to make the 9/11 anniversary about him, but this one was a little tricker. Thankfully, he found a way on Saturday as he visited Shanksville, Pennsylvania:
“And uh, I’m speaking to uh, what, what, what were the people who died, what would they be thinking? They think it makes sense to be doing this kinda thing where you ride down the street and see a sign that says ‘F so-and-so’?” Biden asked.
First off, it’s not “F so-and-so” it’s “F*ck Joe Biden. Secondly, people who died in the 9/11 terrorists attacks, like all dead people, don’t think about anything, mostly because they are dead.
Biden indicates that he can talk to dead people, so if he is indeed a ghost whisperer, the 9/11 victims would almost certainly express their disappointment in Joe. After being killed in the worst terrorist attack on American soil, U.S. soldiers paid the ultimate price to bring those terrorists to justice, and Biden undid 20 years of sacrifice in 2 weeks with his botched Afghanistan troop withdrawal. Now Biden is using the 9/11 victims to distract from his incompetence, so to answer his question: the people who died would say “F*ck Joe Biden!”
Joe also addressed another pressing issue: his boxing match with Donald Trump. Last week, Trump was asked the hypothetical of who he would like to fight if he ever stepped in the ring. Trump responded that he’d like to fight Biden because the frail old man would be a very easy opponent.
Much to everyone’s shock, Biden didn’t threaten to take Trump behind the gym or challeng the former president to a push-up contest. Instead, he whined and rambled:
“This idea, you know, ‘what do you want do with Biden? I want box him.’ I should be so lucky. Yinami,” Biden said.
It does look like Joe is open to a Trump/Biden bout, even with that “yinami” business. Then again, he delivered the “I should be so lucky” very meekly and quickly turned the subject to more nonsense:
“But it’s, the kinds of things, or you know, stuff that’s coming out of Florida, the stuff that’s coming out of, you know, Robert E. Lee is in Afghanistan, you’re the one. Anyway, I’m telling you too much,” said Biden.
Huh? Robert E. Lee is in Afghanistan? He’s right, he definitely told us too much. Also, even though Robert E. Lee is most famous for his humiliating defeat in the Battle of Gettysburg, even he wouldn’t have f*cked Afghanistan up as badly as Biden did.
Biden’s handlers had him pre-record a statement on 9/11, rather than deliver a live speech, because they wanted to avoid the embarrassment of Joe speaking off-script. Now you know why.
The 9/11 anniversary was supposed to be about remembering the victims but Joe Biden turned it into an insane rant about how he’s the real victim because of the “F*ck Joe Biden!” movement. Ironically, it really does give “F*ck Joe Biden!” legitimacy and purpose.
